Rebellious seems to be associated with thoughts of angsty teens, or crazy untrained toddlers wrecking the cereal isle. Its true tho right? Being a rebel has been the anthem of a season we often reminisce about during the overwhelming times of stress, uncertainty and chaos, because ironically it provides some sort of comfort. So what if I told you those days weren’t over? That you still are and will continue to be a rebellious child for some time. Would you scoff at my assumption and throw your hand in my face, or laugh at the insinuating simplicity of that “stage” of life and tell me that you’re “SO over it”? Grab some joe and sit with me a minute….
I was at the drive through of a Taco Bell down the street from the hustle and bustle of my Tuesday afternoon, simply trying to grab some, uh, nutritious munch for my lunch. FAIL. Okay, so I didn’t take the time to prep my healthy tuna and pecan salad with grapes, celery & PB and a large water….I’m busy okay? Anyway – I was driving back, trying to catch every light on the way there when out of left field I caught myself in a full blow adult tantrum about food. In my head. NON-audible, but winning. Yeah – winning. I laughed out loud (or is it LOL’d) and started a breathing treatment to gain my composure. I flipped my bluetooth on, found Bethel waiting to sooth my flexed ego and decided to ask Papa if there was annnnyyyyythinggggg He’d like to share with me about my current “thought process”. And BOOM. How does that go? Ask and ye shall find, knock and shall be opened unto you? Great.
He told me to pull over, open my Bible app and “turn” to 1 Samuel 15:22
“Has the Lord as much delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices as in obeying the voice of the Lord? Behold, to obey is better than sacrifice, and to heed than the fat of rams. For rebellion is as the sin of divination, and insubordination is as iniquity and idolatry…..”.
Come-on man….too many big words. So I dialed it back and decided to read the whole story.
So- once upon a time, God commanded Saul to go destroy the Amalekites and fight against them until they were exterminated. Stout sentence for king Agag of the Amalekites – however he was known for “…making women childless….” [1Sam 15:33]. So there’s that. Onward…. Saul thought it would be cool to just kill most of the Amalekites, bring the king back along with “….some of the spoil, sheep and oxen, the choicest of the things devoted to destruction to sacrifice to the Lord…” [1Sam 15:20] I guess he knew better than God, or wanted to impress Him? Not exactly sure, but I plan to add that to my bucket list of questions for people of the Bible when I get to heaven. I kept reading.
“Ok Papa, how does this mirror my current situation?”…..”Obedience & teachability Julie, pick one.” Ewe.
The Bible says obedience is better than sacrifice. In other words we can live sacrificially by tithing, giving to the poor, eating healthy and so on – but the big question is, can you be told what to do? Are you teachable? Calm the hairs on your neck it’s only a question. But seriously, “be told what to do?” yeah, so uh, I’m an adult now, and people don’t “tell me what to do” anymore…………….yeah.
Rebellion:
: opposition to one in authority or dominance
: open, armed, and usually unsuccessful defiance of or resistance to an established government
: an instance of such defiance or resistance
I just had to laugh at myself. There I was in a full-blown fit about how I’m too tired to make my lunch because I own/run a business that is currently running me, I’m a wife, a mother of others, I’ve got TWO dogs, a pile of laundry that’s been there since 1997, hormones that declare war on a ‘whenever its inconvenient’ basis, blah, blah, waaaaaah. I “sacrifice” myself for the betterment of others. There I said it. The crux for all women. We choose selfless martyrdom. And all the time Papa is whispering “Come to me…..get up that extra 30 mins early to walk on the treadmill and steep in my presence……pack your lunch tonight so you don’t have to worry about it in the morning………………..don’t worry about that, I’ve got it…..” But we know better right? Saul didn’t NOT do what God told him to, exactly. He just had a different vision of how it should go. He mapped out a clear path that he could sketch out and execute in his own power. Familiar? Me too.
Then you have Samuel, his homeboy. He was really sad for Saul. At the end of that chapter is says that Samuel didn’t see Saul again until the day of his death; for Samuel grieved over Saul. COMMUNITY. ACCOUNTABILITY. Are you teachable? Do you interpret things to suit yourself rather than learning the power of obedience? We’ve got friends to bounce thoughts off of and hopefully share truth in love….get some. I need a few more, ask me.
Obedience is referenced in the bible another time:
“For as through the one man’s disobedience the many were made sinners, even so through the obedience of the One the many will be made righteous.” (Romans 5:19 NASB)
Obedience WILL (not can) change the world. So what if God is asking you to just listen this one time….and that leads to many more times. Then victory happens for a very small portion of your life. Those turn into weeks and months, then testimonies and conversations about freedom with your girlfriend over coffee. She gains perspective, a bit of obedience and shares with her other friend. It will change the world, but we must decide ourselves first. He really is fond of us. He really does pursue us. Because, well, He loves us. And that should be enough for me to trust His vision for my life. Stop trying to take it back….you’re not good at it anyway.
Drops mic. Walks away in a slow-motion with epic 80’s movie music playing……….
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