People pleasing. It is an endless game we force on ourselves through a filtered mindset of rules and expectations that really don’t exist. This self-imposed life we strive to live up to, day in and day out, is in need of a shift in perspective.

I am a wife, a mother-of-others, a business owner, a Jesus lover and a friend. I go through my day mindlessly doing something for someone else at all times. I’m tired. I’m stressed. I’m on the verge of pulling my hair out most days. So where’s my balance?

Before we unwrap that lets understand what balance really is. What’s the first thing that comes to mind? Is it some complicated Yoga pose? High wires? Juggling on one foot? The actual definition of balance is this:

: the state of having your weight spread equally so that you do not fall

: the ability to move or to remain in a position without losing control or falling

: a state in which different things occur in equal or proper amounts or have an equal or proper amount of importance

Good right? It seems to cover a lot in three short sentences. More than I can say for this blog, but lets keep moving.

Indulge me for a quick moment. What if I told you that our balance was defined by the world we currently live in? Balance becomes diluted and defined by un-balanced places all the time. This world defines “busy” as the new normal. Why? Who wants to run around at all times with no time for self or enjoyment of life? Insert Jimmy Fallon’s “EW” here. Yet we accept it. We strive to “be” it. We have been brainwashed by society and invisible rules. It’s time we remember Who’s we are.

The Word has plenty to say about people pleasing in Galatians 1. In a letter to the people of Galatia, Paul writes about the perversion of the Gospel. I found it comical and ironic.

He begins by saying:

“6 I am amazed that you are so quickly deserting Him who called you by the grace of Christ, for a different gospel; 7 which is really not another; only there are some who are disturbing you and want to distort the gospel of Christ.”. 

He totally called them out for deserting ‘Him’. Being God. Where all Truth comes from. He then goes on to call out those who are ‘disturbing you’ and distorting the truth. Mirror that to your own circumstances and you will see how someone’s “good advice” can derail your thought process from one that comes direct from your relationship with God, to one that slowly fades to the expectation of the world’s view. People pleasing. Even if it’s unintended, we do it. All the time.

He then curses those who distort truth, which does two things for me:

1.) Makes me want to point and laugh at those who do that; &

2.) Reminds me that I am one of those people.

*ugh…currently thanking God for His grace* …moving on.

Enter the practical thought application:

“10 For am I now seeking the favor of men, or of God? Or am I striving to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a bond-servant of Christ.”

A wonderful reminder of Who’s we are. A rough, but necessary guideline to a daily renewing of the mind.

I’ll add my two cents to the practical application and be done: I ask myself three questions on a constant basis. Why constant? Because I forget & I’m a chronic people pleaser…unintended, but habits don’t change over-night.

1.) Do I feel good physically?

2.) Do I feel good emotionally?

3.) Do I feel good spiritually?

You can immediately tell if you have balance depending on the answer to those three questions. If one is a ‘no’, take it back to the drawing board. Don’t beat yourself up if you frequent the drawing board. God know’s I don’t. Instead, realize you are not alone. Take my hand and let’s go together. It’s always more fun to go to the Ladies room with your girlfriends. Unnecessary, but definitely more fun.